Second Arrow in Ink

When a teaching becomes branding, and branding becomes cover

Content warning: domestic abuse, strangulation.

I came across a public post showing a tattoo of artwork created by my ex. Seeing his work permanently carried on someone else’s body is jarring for me, not because of the person wearing it, but because it illustrates how effectively an abusive persona can be packaged as “spiritual” and received as trustworthy.

The tattoo design includes the phrase “WHAT SECOND ARROW?” above a skeleton figure pierced by arrows, clutching an orange fish. At the bottom, the image is signed “OLD SICK DEAD.” In other words, the work is not only circulating, it is being claimed and branded.

Why this matters

The “second arrow” is a concept meant to reduce suffering, not decorate it. It points to the way pain is compounded when the mind adds a second layer: blame, story, rumination, self attack, moral superiority, or “I should not feel this.” The point of the teaching is restraint, honesty, and less harm.

So when I see “What second arrow?” used as a signature motif in the branding of a person who has left a private record of violence and coercive control, it lands differently. It reads less like a reminder toward accountability and more like a shield. A way to recast consequences as “your reaction.” A way to imply that the harmed person is the one creating the problem.

That framing is not neutral. It is one of the oldest reversals in abusive dynamics: harm is done, then the focus shifts to the survivor’s response.

Public record context

In his criminal case, my ex was charged with five felony counts related to abuse, including strangulation. A CPS investigation also resulted in founded findings of abuse involving our children. A jury trial is expected in January 2026.

I am stating that because it is not gossip. It is context that exists in records outside of me.

Personal context

Since I left on December 5, 2024, he has not contributed to child support, while continuing to present himself publicly as a spiritual teacher through art and online presence.

This contrast is the point of this entry.

What gets distorted when a persona is polished

A public image can be curated to look gentle, insightful, and safe. The aesthetic can be compelling. The language can be persuasive. The community reception can be real.

But a polished presentation does not outweigh the private record.

When harm is present, “teachings” can be used as narrative control. Not always with grand speeches. Sometimes through small, repeated insinuations:

• If you name the harm, you are “attached.”

• If you are afraid, you are “reactive.”

• If you set a boundary, you are “the second arrow.”

That is not wisdom. That is deflection dressed as virtue.

Why I am documenting this

I am documenting this tattoo image because it is a public artifact that shows how branding travels. It is evidence of reach. It also clarifies the mechanism. A spiritual concept is being used as a recognizable signature, while the private record reflects coercion and violence.

This is not about attacking strangers. It is about preserving coherence.

Boundaries

Please do not contact, harass, threaten, or dox anyone connected to this image. This is documentation and commentary, not a call to mobilize.

Artist credit: Old Sick Dead

Non-Harm Includes Accountability

(Reference: Kyle Morgan, public Facebook post dated December 25, 2025.)

On December 25, 2025, one year to the day after I filed my divorce papers, Kyle Morgan published a public post titled “Were You Conscious Of The Overkill?” In it, he frames repeated definition as cruelty, suggests that restraint of “consciousness” is compassion, and closes with a blessing for peace in one’s practice.

Here is what I know to be true, both psychologically and ethically.

Clarity is not cruelty

Repeating the truth is not the same thing as punishing someone. When a person has lived through denial, minimization, reframing, and reality distortion, the mind and body do not stabilize through silence. They stabilize through clarity. They stabilize through consistency. They stabilize through a coherent record that cannot be edited in real time by whoever has the most charm, the most control, or the loudest narrative.

A single spear can wound. A hundred spears is torture. But naming what happened, accurately, is not a spear. It is a boundary. It is orientation. It is the restoration of contact with reality.

Compassion is not comfort for the one who caused harm

Compassion is not asking the harmed to stop speaking so the one who caused harm can feel more comfortable. Compassion is non-harm. Compassion is accountability without theatrics. Compassion is repair where repair is owed.

Restraint is not “stop noticing.” Restraint is stopping the behavior that keeps generating new evidence, and then tolerating the truth without trying to control it.

Legal status is not the same thing as repair

Separation and divorce do not automatically end harm. Harm can continue post-separation through choices that prolong conflict, distort reality, pressure silence, or destabilize the people who are trying to recover and rebuild. Legal status is not the same thing as ethical repair. Filing dates do not reset the nervous system. Consistent, accountable behavior does.

What holds up under daylight

I am not interested in diagnosing anyone. I am interested in patterns and outcomes. I am interested in what holds up under daylight. I am interested in whether someone’s private conduct matches their public posture, and whether their idea of “peace” requires other people to become silent.

I will continue to speak truthfully and document what is real. If clarity is called “overkill,” so be it. I am not here to protect a mask. I am here to protect the record.

Image note: The image shown is an original graphic gifted to me on July 6, 2023.

Artwork credit: Kyle Morgan (also known online as “Old Sick Dead”).