I AM HIS KARMA

A survivor-led archive of betrayal, coercive control, motherhood, evidence, photography, art, nervous-system healing, and the life I am rebuilding in real time.

A living archive of betrayal, survival, motherhood, evidence, photographs, nervous-system healing, creativity, and the life I am rebuilding in real time.

Rebekah standing inside the childcare space she built, surrounded by learning materials and a wooden train track.
Rebekah standing inside the childcare space she built, surrounded by learning materials and a wooden train track.

I was standing inside the life I had built when this story began.

Everything I Notice

Essays, photographs, and reflections from a life being rebuilt.

Everything I Notice
The Peace He Performed
The Peace He Performed

In the weeks immediately after our separation, Kyle Morgan, working publicly as Old Sick Dead, published Buddhist artwork about restraint, suffering, compassion, ethical conduct, freedom, and peace. These works do not prove abuse. They document something else: the profound distance between the moral identity being presented publicly and the reality I experienced privately.

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Abuse Tried to Erase Me. It Failed.
Abuse Tried to Erase Me. It Failed.

On October 2, 2025, a simple Wheel of Needs changed how I understood twenty years of intimate terrorism. Looking at the most basic human needs, including safety, honesty, empathy, rest, autonomy, and community, I realized that every one of them had been systematically dismantled. This essay explores how prolonged coercive control reshaped my brain, my nervous system, and my ability to function, and why survivors and their children need safety before healing can truly begin.

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I Have the Emails
I Have the Emails

Contemporaneous emails and letters from 2008, 2009, and 2018 reveal how years of hurt, self-questioning, chronic blame, betrayal, and emotional depletion existed long before the marriage ended. A first-person record of nearly twenty years spent trying to be heard—and the life still being rebuilt afterward.

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The Evidence Archive

A chronological record of messages, documents, photographs, and public records.

Evidence Archive
November 8, 2024: The Breakup Text Exchange
November 8, 2024: The Breakup Text Exchange

This November 8, 2024 text exchange documents my attempt to end my marriage, repeated requests for Kyle Morgan to leave, my statement that I did not feel safe, and the conflict that followed. The redacted messages are preserved as contemporaneous evidence.

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Unrequited Love, Weaponized
Unrequited Love, Weaponized

A personal letter written in 2018, more than five years before I left the marriage, documenting betrayal, chronic blame, impossible standards, emotional depletion, false promises, and the gradual loss of self.

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iChat — April 28, 2016
iChat — April 28, 2016

An April 28, 2016 Apple Messages/iChat record documenting hours of relationship conflict, insults and accusations, my contemporaneous expressions of fear, medication and sexuality being raised during the argument, attempts to seek counseling, and Kyle’s eventual acknowledgment: “You are not wrong” and “I am sorry for trying to hurt you with my ugly insults and language.”

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EXPLORE THE RECORD

Evidence Archive

A chronological archive of preserved messages, letters, photographs, financial records, public documents, and other contemporaneous evidence.

The archive is being published in stages as each item is reviewed, redacted, and placed in context.

ENTER THE EVIDENCE ARCHIVE

Everything I Notice

Survivor-led essays and photographs exploring domestic violence, coercive control, betrayal, motherhood, poverty, trauma, institutional failure, nervous-system healing, creativity, and rebuilding.

READ THE BLOG

Old Sick Dead Art Archive

A living archive of artwork created by Kyle Morgan under the name Old Sick Dead, preserved alongside the personal history, material support, and creative labor that surrounded it.

OLD SICK DEAD ART ARCHIVE

About

Learn more about who I am, why I created I Am His Karma, and the life I am rebuilding beyond the record.

ABOUT ME

A LIVING ARCHIVE

This is not a polished story written after everything ended.

The record continues to grow as I uncover the truth, survive the consequences, protect my family, and rebuild my life.

Some material is personal, explicit, and unfinished. You do not need to read everything or proceed in order. Read at your own pace.

SUPPORT THE WORK

I research, scan, organize, redact, transcribe, write, fact-check, publish, and maintain this archive myself while raising two teenagers, managing serious health conditions, and rebuilding without a reliable family safety net.

Contributions help preserve the archive, keep the website accessible, and create the stability required to continue this work.

DONATE

WHY I BUILT THIS

I created this website because I kept uncovering pieces of the truth and needed somewhere to put them.

Abuse becomes easier to deny when every message, photograph, financial record, apology, and incident is viewed separately. This site brings those pieces together so the pattern can be seen.

I needed a place where my story could not be interrupted, denied, rewritten, mocked, or turned back against me.

What began as documentation of another person’s behavior became a record of my own survival.

This is where I preserve the evidence, tell the story, share my photographs and essays, document my healing, and build the life that comes next.

This website belongs to me.

EXPANDED ARCHIVE

PAID ACCESS COMING SOON

The public Evidence Archive is available now and will continue to grow.

A separate expanded archive is in development. Paid access will include the full chronological story, additional redacted evidence and documents, photographs, private essays, explicit 18+ chapters, healing and nervous-system reflections, family rebuilding updates, and new material as the record develops.